Eight Things This Book Will Help You Achieve
本书将帮你达到的八项技能 1
How This Book Was WrittenAnd Why By Dale Carnegie
本书的形成，为什么是由戴尔?6?1卡耐基写成的 2
Nine Suggestions on How to Get the Most out of This Book
从本书获得最大教益的九条建议 10
Part One Fundamental Techniques in Handling People
第一篇 人际交往的基本技巧
1 If You Want to Gather Honey,Don''t Kick over the Beehive 第1章 要想
采蜜，就不要踢翻蜂巢 16
2 The Big Secret of Dealing with People 第2章 与人交往的秘诀 32
3 He Who Can Do This Has the Whole World with Him. He Who Cannot
Walks a Lonely Way 第3章 激发他人的强烈需求 47
Part Two Six Ways to Make People Like You
第二篇 让别人喜欢你的六种方法
1 Do This and You''ll Be Welcome Anywhere 第1章 这样做你就会到处受
欢迎 68
2 A Simple Way to Make a Good First Impression 第2章 产生良好印象的
简单方法 82
3 If You Don''t Do This,You Are Headed for Trouble 第3章 牢记他人的
名字 91
4 An Easy Way to Become a Good Conversationalist 第4章 如何成为优秀
的谈话家 101
5 How to Interest People 第5章 如何让别人对你感兴趣 111
6 How to Make People Like You Instantly 第6章 如何使人马上喜欢你 115
Part Three How to Win People to Your Way of Thinking
第三篇 如何赢得别人的赞同
1 You Can''t Win an Argument 第1章 你赢不了争论 130
2 A Sure Way of Making EnemiesAnd How to Avoid It 第2章 如何避免
树敌招怨 138
3 If You''re Wrong,Admit It 第3章 勇于承认自己的错误 150
4 A Drop of Honey 第4章 一切从友善开始 158
5 The Secret of Socrates 第5章 苏格拉底的秘诀 168
6 The Safety Valve in Handling Complaints 第6章 处理抱怨的灵丹妙药 175
7 How to Get Co-operation 第7章 如何赢得合作 181
8 A Formula That Will Work Wonders for You 第8章 从对方的立场看
问题 187
9 What Everybody Wants 第9章 每个人都需要的东西 193
10 An Appeal That Everybody Likes 第10章 激发高尚的动机 202
11 The Movies Do It. TV Does It. Why Don''t You Do It? 第11章 戏剧化地
表达你的意见 208
12 When Nothing Else Works,Try This 第12章 提出有意义的挑战 213
Part Four Be a Leader： How to Change People without
Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment
第四篇 领导艺术：如何改变他人而不招致反感或怨恨
1 If You Must Find Fault,This is the Way to Begin 第1章 从赞美和欣赏
开始 218
2 How to Criticizeand Not Be Hated for It 第2章 间接提醒对方的
错误 225
3 Talk about Your Own Mistakes First 第3章 先谈你自己的错误 229
4 No One Likes to Take Orders 第4章 没有人喜欢接受命令 234
5 Let the Other Person Save Face 第5章 让对方保住面子 237
6 How to Spur People on to Success 第6章 称赞最微小的进步 241
7 Give a Dog a Good Name 第7章 送人一顶高帽子 247
8 Make the Fault Seem Easy to Correct 第8章 使错误更容易改正 252
9 Making People Glad to Do What You Want 第9章 使人乐意做你建议
的事 255
Part Five Letters That Produced Miraculous Results
第五篇 创造奇迹的信 259
Part Six Seven Rules for Making Your Home Life Happier
第六篇 使你的家庭生活更幸福的七条规则
1 How to Dig Your Marital Grave in the Quickest Possible Way 第1章 不要挖掘
婚姻的坟墓 270
2 Love and Let Live 第2章 爱对方，并给他自由 277
3 Do This and You''ll Be Looking up the Time-Tables to Reno 第3章 不要做
无用的批评 280
4 A Quick Way to Make Everybody Happy 第4章 让每个人都高兴的捷径 282
5 They Mean So Much to a Woman 第5章 对女人最有意义的事 285
6 If You Want to Be Happy,Don''t Neglect This One 第6章 如果你想快乐，
不要忽视这点 288
7 Don''t Be a Marriage Illiterate 第7章 不要做婚姻的文盲 292
內容試閱：
Why read this book to find out how to win friends?Why not study the technique of the greatest winner of friends the world has ever known?Who is he?You may meet him tomorrow coming down the street. When you get within ten feet of him,he will begin to wag his tail. If you stop and pat him,he will almost jump out of his skin to show you how much he likes you. And you know that behind this show of affection on his part,there are no ulterior motives： he doesn''t want to sell you any real estate,and he doesn''t want to marry you.
Did you ever stop to think that a dog is the only animal that doesn''t have to work for a living?A hen has to lay eggs,a cow has to give milk,and a canary has to sing. But a dog makes his living by giving you nothing but love.
When I was five years old,my father bought a yellow-haired pup for fifty cents. He was the light and joy of my childhood. Every afternoon about four-thirty,he would sit in the front yard with his beautiful eyes staring steadfastly at the path,and as soon as he heard my voice or saw me swinging my dinner pail through the buck brush,he was off like a shot,racing breathlessly up the hill to greet me with leaps of joy and barks of sheer ecstasy. Tippy was my constant companion for five years. Then one tragic nightI shall never forget ithe was killed within ten feet of my head,killed by lightning. Tippy''s death was the tragedy of my boyhood.
You never read a book on psychology,Tippy. You didn''t need to. You knew by some divine instinct that you can make more friends in two months by becoming genuinely interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you. Let me repeat that. You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.
Yet I know and you know people who blunder through life trying to wigwag other people into becoming interested in them. Of course,it doesn''t work. People are not interested in you. They are not interested in me. They are interested in themselvesmorning,noon and after dinner. The New York Telephone Company made a derailed study of telephone conversations to find out which word is the most frequently used. You have guessed it： it is the personal pronoun I. I. I.It was used 3900 times in 500 telephone conversations. I. I. I. I. When you see a group photograph that you are in,whose picture do you look for first?If we merely try to impress people and get people interested in us,we will never have many true,sincere friends. Friends,real friends,are not made that way.
Alfred Adler,the famous Viennese psychologist,wrote a book entitled What Life Should Mean to You. In that book he says,It is the individual who is not interested in his fellow men who has the greatest difficulties in life and provides the greatest injury to others. It is from among such individuals that all human failures spring.
You may read scores of erudite tomes on psychology without coming across a statement more significant for you and for me. Adler''s statement is so rich with meaning that I am going to repeat it in italices： It is the individual who is not interested in his fellow men who has the greatest difficulties in life and provides the greatest injury to others. It is from among such individuals that all human failures spring.
I once took a course in short-story writing at New York University,and during that course the editor of a leading magazine talked to our class. He said he could pick up any one of the dozens of stories that drifted across his desk every day and after reading a few paragraphs he could feel whether or not the author liked people. If the author doesn''t like people, he said,people won''t like his or her stories.
This hard-boiled editor stopped twice in the course of his talk on fiction writing and apologized for preaching a sermon. I am telling you, he said,the same things your preacher would tell you,but remember,you have to be interested in people if you want to be a successful writer of stories.
If that is true of writing fiction,you can be sure it is true of dealing with people face-to-face.
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